week 4 ( friday );

[reidentify]

[Perhaps it should wait. Bellamy—Lief doesn't know what his emotional state is, but he knows it likely won't be good. He can feel his own deteriorating, hastened by yet another week in which he must worry over Prussia, but he shoves that aside. No matter what, he at least has to remain calm.

And time isn't on their side, so perhaps it shouldn't wait.

Thus, after he's made his rounds, Lief sets out in search of Bellamy.

This isn't going to be a pleasant conversation for many reasons, and though it may be his own paranoia that poisons his thoughts, all Lief can do is hope that at the end of it, he and Bellamy will still be friends.]

Comments

[jettisons]

[Bellamy is sitting on the sand, shoulders hunched. He disappeared after the investigation, and he hasn't exactly been chatty the past few days to begin with. There's too much to think about, too much to grieve. There's a piece of paper clutching tightly in his hand, and he doesn't look up as Lief approaches.]

[reidentify]

[...]

Bellamy.

[It feels wrong, to approach him now. But if he walks away now, he doesn't know if he'll have the courage to do this again.]

I am sorry, but may I speak with you?

[jettisons]

[Bellamy glances up and just nods silently. Lief is welcome to join him, but Bellamy isn't going to be very talkative.]

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[...

Slowly, careful not to bother his shoulder too much, he sits down next to Bellamy. He's quiet for a few moments, before he figures that he should start with the simplest.]

Prussia told you—on Sunday?

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[That gets Bellamy's attention, and he glances over, studying Lief in the low light.]

Depends on what you're talking about.

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[Though he knows that it's cowardly, he looks away.]

I am sorry. I—have known for a while. She told me the night Joshua died, because she regretted not having selected him and Austria.

... I wanted to tell you.

[And he knows that to have actively lied about knowing nothing—that may be a breach of trust for Bellamy (and even now, he's being vague, just in case).]

[jettisons]

It's good that you didn't. Safer for her.

[In fact, Bellamy's a little surprised Lief is apologizing at all. In his mind, that was the only logical choice.]

[reidentify]

[... Honestly, it's a relief to hear that, even if it's short-lived since this is technically the easy part.]

Indeed. I swore to secrecy then for that reason. Anyone who knows is with her permission.

[And with that out of the way, as he didn't want Bellamy to hear from someone else that Lief had known all along rather than from him personally...

He's quiet for a moment, trying to muster up his strength, before—]

Is she the only role you know of?

[There's an odd note to Lief's tone that suggests this isn't entirely a question.]

[jettisons]

[Well, Lief definitely knows something. Bellamy isn't sure he has the energy to deal with this, but that doesn't change anything. He can't check out just because he's upset.]

No.

[reidentify]

[...

He might as well be blunt before he loses whatever backbone he has—but still, it's hard to say.]

Raven.

[jettisons]

[Bellamy exhales slowly, then nods, a brief movement. Raven is most likely dead, and there's nothing more he can do to protect her, so there's no point in lying. He hesitates, turning the folded up piece of paper over and over again in his hands, clearly mulling over something. Finally, he hands it over.]

Read it. She wrote about you.

[reidentify]

[A part of him is hesitant (even as he asks himself why? you wanted her to know that you knew), but he knows he'll regret it more if he doesn't, so he takes the paper.]

links this for future unlocks i guess??? murdergames are hard

[jettisons]

[He'll just wait, quiet, until Lief finishes reading it.]

cries

[reidentify]

[...

In the back of his mind, Lief wonders if Raven ever received his message. Likely not. It doesn't matter now, either way.

... She really is gone. Perhaps Lief never truly believed she could be found, but it fully hits him now, more than ever. Disappeared to who knows where, but she isn't coming back, is she? (Why her?)

He wants to cry, but he can't—not in front of Bellamy, of all people. So he blinks away his tears, swallows the lump in his throat, and says, softly,]

She was right, you know.

[Everything she said about Bellamy, that is.]

down with eli 2k17

[jettisons]

[Bellamy has already done his crying, but Lief's reaction makes his chest tighten all over again. He and Raven had promised each other they wouldn't die in vain, and she's gone anyway. He promised to protect her, and he failed. There's no way he can possibly picture going home without her, and her absence is like a hole, a physical weight. He can't take Lief's compliment at the moment, but it makes him suck in a shaky breath.]

She was trying to fix things. Get us all home.

[reidentify]

[He can't blame Bellamy for being unable to. In his position, Lief likely would've felt the same way.]

... That is all the more reason why we must succeed. Finish what she started.

[jettisons]

[He nods. Put your head down and keep going, Bellamy.]

How did you find out?

[reidentify]

... I had strong suspicions for a while, particularly after you were confirmed to have no role.

[He pauses, and then, cautiously,]

Another Siren confirmed it for me today.

[jettisons]

[God damn it. Bellamy drops his head into his hands, breathing out slowly.]

I'm trying to figure this out, Lief. I'm trying to get us out of here without everyone killing each other. I need you to trust me. Please.

[reidentify]

[...]

I trust you.

[jettisons]

[He's not sure if Lief is just saying that, but he has no choice other than to believe him.]

Thank you. If you find out anything—anything about what the Chiefs are telling people, I need to know.

[reidentify]

[Perhaps it isn't unconditional faith—it's hard for Lief to give that out to anyone—but out of everyone on this island?

Bellamy ranks very high on the list.]

I will. And I would ask that you do the same.

[jettisons]

I don't know how much I can tell you yet. I need to make sure I'm not putting anyone in danger.

[Not that he doesn't trust Lief, but he knows how badly this sort of thing can go.]

[reidentify]

[Lief can't begrudge him for that. His entire life was built on secrecy, after all.]

Understood. Just—do not keep me in the dark forever, please.

[jettisons]

It won't be forever. I promise.

[reidentify]

[He manages a smile, however weak.]

Then I have faith in you.